Author

My Book: B L O O M

Bloom, the Broken Love Of Our Mothers, is a book of memoir, self-awareness, and self-development, of experience, strength and hope, of healing at the core of our wounds.  Bloom is for anyone, particularly any woman, who has experienced the ‘mother fracture’, whether through abandonment, neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, or simply an unexplainable distance from the woman who gave them life.   It is my belief that “suffering is not enough”.

My desire to go beyond the knowledge of my trauma was born out of continuing to find myself in relationships where abandonment, panic, depression, and wounding were the redundant outcome.  Propelling myself into movement beyond awareness, into willingness, and from willingness into action, has brought forth a fullness of healing, that I may never have experienced had I stayed lost in only the knowledge of what happened.  My mother left when I was thirteen leaving a vacuous hole, a fractured relationship to my own womanhood, and a deep desire to be taken care of.

I have discovered the depth of this wound, of the mother leaving, emotionally and or physically is not unique to me nor to a handful of women, rather it is an epidemic covertly attacking the family unit.  Little girls, in grown up bodies, are struggling to parent their own children, find happiness and success in intimate relationships, and desperately seeking an escape from what feels like the overwhelming responsibility of mothering themselves, their families, and the world.  The crux of the book, Bloom, and its subsequent ‘project’, lies in guiding the reader beyond the awareness of her pain, or simply the understanding of it, but into the fullness of complete healing.

I wrote Bloom to teach the ‘un-mothered’, how to become ‘mothered’ by creating her own internal parent, her own internal mother.  This book is for women, who have lived out of their brokenness, wounded-ness, and heartache, allowing, though often unconsciously, the “dis-ease” of their pain to make their choices, to determine their life.

The posture of Bloom is not that of a flower perking up on a glistening spring morning, but rather of humility, of a seeker, of a wanderer coming home. Through my work with 12 step recovery, ministry, creative writing, and song writing, I have discovered the paradox of every seed.

Before blooming there is dying.  There is heartache, excruciating heart ache, however, it must not end in an acceptance of sorrow, but reach beyond to the rest of the story.  We were not born in need of a mother, not given a mother, and therefore forced to accept our condition as ‘motherless’.  At birth we were given everything we would need, the seed was planted.  The mother has been in us all along.  The time has come to bring her back, to wake her up, to mother ourselves, to stop the cycle, to heal what has been broken.

The time has come to Bloom.

Bloom is scheduled for release in late 2011, until then please enjoy the blog, which is also written in the spirit of healing.